Thursday, February 28, 2008

Here we go again

Well I never made it to the chiropractor, instead I left work early to take Nolan to the doctor. He exhibited the signs of an ear infection. Runny nose, cough, congestion. It turns out that this time his ears were fine!! Thank the lord! The doctor sent us on our way and we made a stop at the drugstore to pick up a prescription for a decongestant and saline spray. I walked inside and saw the pharmacist who happened to be a friend of mine, Jennifer. I was shocked that she was there, because I knew she worked at a different location. Apparently she floats on occasion. She was happy to see the baby and gave me excellent customer service! There's definitely benefits to living in a small town.

Pain in the “Back”

For the first time in my life, I’m experiencing pain and discomfort in my lower back. Have I reached that magical age where your body starts to deteriorate? It sure seems that way. Long gone are the days of endless cartwheels, flips, back bends and many other maneuvers of a once youthful body. I’m not sure how or when this happened, but I’ve been uncomfortable for about a week now. At first, I thought I must have hit my back on something, maybe slightly bruising the area. Could it be from jumping on the trampoline with Zachery? I’ve given it a week and not only has it not improved, but it’s gotten worse. So much so that when I go home I just want to sit on the couch. Having a 6 month old does not help this situation. He likes being held, needs diaper changes and baths. None of these activities are forgiving on ones back. My husband was extra helpful last night and took care of Nolan while I enjoyed a long hot shower. He also cleaned up the kitchen after dinner……..thank you honey~. I’ve come to the conclusion that I must have a pinched nerve and it’s been suggested that I see a chiropractor. I’m reluctant to do so, because I’ve never been to one before and I’ve never gotten past the skepticism and questionable qualifications of someone re-configuring your spine. I’ve been asking around and have heard nothing but positive reinforcement for this profession. My co-worker, Lee, swears by it and says, “she always leaves feeling much, much better.” In fact, she says she “loves going to the chiropractor.” Well, at this point, I’m in so much pain that I’ve lost all ability to put this off and make excuses. So, I’ll let you know how the appointment goes………..

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

A beautiful ride

As I was leaving for work this morning, I opened the garage door and looked outside to see beautiful snowflakes falling. Yesterday, I drove to work in the rain; I much prefer this mornings soft, fluffy flakes. It won’t accumulate too much, but it sure did put a smile on my face. I’m sure hundreds of kids were praying and begging for a snow day. Around here it doesn’t take much to have a school closing, because of the curvy mountain roads. I grew up in West Virginia and we had much harsher winters. We got our fair share of blizzards and as a child I benefited from quite a few snow days. I recall that buzz from the possibility of no school. My friends and I would call each other on the phone and talk with anticipation of getting a “free day”. These are the mornings that you would wake up “before” your alarm clock sounded; wide eyed and ready for the day at home, racing to turn on the radio and crossing your fingers to hear them say the magic words…………..Jefferson County schools are CLOSED! My sister and I would jump up and down in excitement over this news. What I wouldn’t give to have that feeling again, pure relief without any worry or guilt.

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

What a difference a day makes

The alarm goes off and I squint to focus in on my clock. It’s 5:30 a.m. and this is the first time I’ve opened my eyes since I went to bed last night. That being said, Nolan slept the entire night. It’s amazing how different one feels with a good nights sleep. In retrospect, I wonder how I made it through the day literally coasting through on fumes. Three hours of sleep is just plain not enough and since I’m breastfeeding I don’t have the luxury of juicing up with caffeine - no way to kick start myself or jolt my brain into activity. Today, however, I feel great. Nolan, himself, seemed much happier this morning and showcased non-stop smiling and laughs. This is a much more appealing way to start the day.

Work has been running smoother for me, as well. We’ve been operating the last couple of weeks Director[less] – some of you may not be aware that Julio, my boss, is no longer in his position as Director of Physical Plant. This shock came about on February 12th and since then we’ve been sorta floating on our own. I did notice this morning that they did post a job announcement for the Director’s position. I was so sad to see Julio go, but I’m ready to get someone in here and up and running. I’m nervous about this for our whole department and for me personally, because I am a direct report to the Director. I worry about the new person’s expectations, personality and work ethic. I know that I shouldn’t worry, but that’s my nature. I worked for Julio for a little over 3 years, the entire time I’ve been in this position. He was who hired me. I usually can get along with most anyone, but I’m hoping that this next boss won’t be some psycho, control freak who piles on the work and looks over your shoulder demanding that this be done yesterday. My co-worker, Susie, told me at my first day on the job, “there’s never a dull moment around here and every day something new and unexpected happens.” Boy was she right! Just when you think you’ve heard it all…….you’re yet again left in astonishment. The latest being the Julio incident. One day he’s your boss, the next day he’s packing up and moving to another building. Mind you, he has a different title, same pay, less responsibilities, but how they went about it is what bothers me. As far as I know, they never formally sat down with him, counseled or wrote him up. So, he never had any fair chance of acknowledgement or ability to make improvements. It was just, we're making changes and one of them is that you are no longer the Director of Physical Plant. I believe the shock has finally worn off for him and me, but it will always be an unresolved issue on my conscience. So for now I guess we will see what tomorrow brings………..

Monday, February 25, 2008

Sleepless in Georgia

For some unknown reason my 6 month old son, Nolan, decided to wake up numerous times last night. I made my way to bed between 10:30 and 11:00 and was in a state of sleep that is somewhere between dreaming and consciousness. You know when you feel like your sleeping, but not totally there? Then, I heard it, the dreaded cry screeching through the monitor. You gotta love em. It's actually a love hate thing, I've been tempted to just turn the thing off, but what if something happened? A strange noise or life altering cry that would send me to my feet running like a mad woman down the hall to Nolan's room. It is for that reason that I must leave it on. I walked into Nolan's room, changed his diaper and then proceeded to nurse him. This seemed to calm him instantly. Wonderful! Right? Not quite. As soon as I gingerly laid him down he instantly awoke and began crying. Maybe he's still hungry? I fed him some more, same reaction, he happily ate and seemed to be asleep. I placed him carefully in his crib, trying not to disturb his slumber, but yet again he awoke and began to cry. I quickly picked him up danced and rocked him side to side, it worked. Well, somehow the crib must have something on it that sends sensors to my son's back quickly alerting him that he has left his mother's arms. AHA! What does every mother do in this incident? I made my way downstairs for the Tylenol. He's been teething so I thought maybe his teeth are bothering him. I also threw in some Ora gel. That will have to do the trick. Finally, by 1:30 I was able to place him in his crib and RUN for my bed. I didn't run fast enough, because as soon as I was just about to crawl back into the warmth of my bed he started crying again.......UUGGGGHHH! Back in I go, this time I decide to wait him out and see if he cries himself to sleep. I sit on the floor next to his crib and lean against the wall. I somehow am able to drift away slightly even through the crying. I get up and go to bed. I don't even know what time it is now and I don't want to know. My eyes open to more crying, this time I look at the clock - it's 4:30, back I go making the march down the well worn path that I'm able to follow with my eyes closed. My son is smiling up at me like it's completely normal to be awake at this hour. I feed him again and rock him and lay him down. Same routine as before. This go around lasts until 5:15. Man, I've got to get up for work and that doesn't give me much more sleeping time. I go ahead and just turn that annoying alarm clock off. My husbands alarm is set for 6:00, I'll just get up then. I vaguely remember hearing my husbands alarm, then the running shower, then the garage door going down. Yikes! My husband and son are leaving for work/school! That means it's almost 7:00! I need to be at work by 8, I'd better put it into high gear. Of course, at this point my son is happily and soundly sleeping like there's no tomorrow. I have no problems waking HIM up this time. Even after the interrupted night of sleeping, he still greets me with a good morning smile that melted my heart. I picked him up and gave him a big hug and lot's of kisses and told him that I was sorry he had a rough night. I don't know why he had a bad night.......I'm wondering if the lady at Starbucks missed the part where I said Decaf - please. Whatever the case may be, I'm praying tonight will be a different story.

Saturday, February 23, 2008

A Happy Ending

Let's just say that my day off from work was not really a day off. You always want what you can't have and that rings true as a working mother of two. Friday's are usually days at work you wish the weekend would come on already. You count down the hours until quitting time and race out of your office life you were about to win the gold medal at a finish line. But really all you are doing is rushing to get out the door so you can relax and breath easy, AAAHHH the weekend. Most mothers know that's not the case. The real work is just beginning. As was the case for me yesterday....Friday.....I took the day off because after a handful of phone calls, a half a dozen times of shuffling around appointments, I managed to have 3 different doctor appointments scheduled all in the same day at DIFFERENT times and in different offices. That in itself is a miracle. It all started with an 8:15 a.m. appointment with a dermatologist for my eldest son, Zachery. We, meaning myself, Zachery and Nolan had to leave our house at 7:30 in order to make our appointment. We found the office fine, but what I wasn't prepared for was our rude nurse. She was short, (verbally) snippy, a know it all and very condescending. She ended our little meeting pre-doctor visit in a nice way playfully smiling and cooing with Nolan, so I wrote it off as maybe taking her wrong. Then Jeanette, the PA arrives. Nice enough, so it seemed, until she starts performing a medicinal task without introduction or so much as an explanation. This was the beginning of my dismay. I questioned what it was she was doing and asked if she could explain it to me. She stopped and after discussion and the ability to make a decision myself for my son, I asked her to presume. She then made the comment, "well that's what I was going to do in the first place." That being said and done, she proceeded to scurry about and tried wrapping up our appointment without so much as a thorough examination. I kept finding and seeing more things she missed and would point them out to her dismay. As we were leaving and walking out the door I noticed some more missed diagnosis, due to her obvious "hurry" to get out the door and on to the next Number. She seemed irritated by this and went on out the door and sent the nurse in to finish her job (the job she didn't thoroughly complete). So, here I am again with the lovely nurse. She proceeds to finish the job, but she is doing this in a way that is causing my son great discomfort. I can see him tensing in pain and when the tears started dropping from his eyes onto his lap, that's when I spoke up. This is hurting him, when the doctor did this he didn't cry and she didn't do it that way. Her response, "Well, this is how I was trained and this is how I do it." That infuriated me!!! She finished up and I stormed out of there. At check out we needed to schedule a check up visit. The lady tried scheduling me with the same person. I refused the same person and said I do NOT want to see her again I need to be scheduled with someone else. The look on her face was astonishing! She almost fumbled over herself. At this point most people would have caused a scene. If you know me at all, I am not that kind of person. I am probably one of the most patient, understanding people you will meet. I get along with most anyone and I avoid conflict at all measures. This incident was pushing it for me. As I was standing there facing her my hands were shaking ( a definite sign that I've had it) and my usually smiling face was stiff and unfriendly. She could see this and didn't push it with me. As we were exiting the building I was getting madder and madder by the second. When I made it to the car the first thing I did was to call my husband. He got an earful from me and quickly said, what's their number? My husband and I are very different in how we handle adversity. Because of this incident, my husband was late in making an out of town appointment. He was still at home when we arrived back and as we entered our home, the phone rang. It was a call back from the head doctor in charge of this practice. My husband exited to the basement and engaged in a conversation with complete rhetoric, pretty much word for word of my experience with our treatment. The doctor, apologized, said he would talk with both of them and offered to see us personally and for free at our next visit if we chose to come back. This satisfied me, as long as I don't have to see that nurse again. I'm not sure at this point if I will go back. Our next appointment was for Nolan, at 2:15. This visit went well. Nolan has had 4-5 ear infections in his short 6 month life and that caused me great concern. I don't like seeing him sick and I was concerned of there being hearing damage. Being greeted by this nurse and doctor was like night and day. It was good to have someone to compare this with, because without a doubt I could see it wasn't just me. Nolan does meet the criteria for tubes in his ears, but the doctor thinks we should wait and get through the winter season and more into spring before we make any decisions. I totally agreed with him and was actually relieved. I don't want to rush into surgery especially if it's not completely necessary. Next, we were on to the next office. Nolan's 6 month check up. This go around only required 2 injections.....WHEW. He handled them pretty well. He is developmentally right on target and actually the doctor seemed surprised that I already had him sleeping in his crib in his own room. This shock actually shocked me. He's been sleeping in his own room since between 3 and 4 months old. I guess I'm doing better than I thought. He also sleeps through the night and has for some time now. It's actually a very simple process of putting him to bed. He usually goes to sleep around 8:30 by just laying him in bed and giving him his blanket. No fuss, no mess, right off to sleepy land. I'm blessed with 2 wonderful boys. Anyway, that visit went well, the nurse was extra nice as if she knew about my previous engagement with the nurse from he**. The doctor was not in a rush to get out of the room with us and spoke to me slowly, carefully and like I was the only patient he had that day. Things were looking up. We headed back to town (approx. 30 min. drive) and rushed to change and get ready for the evening we had planned. Brian, myself and Zachery were driving to see David Copperfield. My husband was already in that direction at a wrestling event at the Arena. This meant that me and Zachery had to drive there and meet him. Grandma Paula so graciously arrived at our house to keep Nolan for us - thanks! As soon as she showed up we flew out the door and headed out. First of all, I am not good with directions. Mix that with Friday night traffic, rain and dark and this makes for a bad combination. We were scooting right along making good time and doing well, then we hit a bottle neck of traffic. This delayed us about 10 - 15 minutes. Not too bad, so far we still had plenty of time to make our 8:30 show time. Now the fun begins. I'm supposed to be able to find a place I've never been, by following directions my husband gives me that I've written down while driving in the rain and dark...........well, you guessed it I got lost. When I'm in these kinds of situations I panic. I can't think straight and I get very stressed. After a couple of phone exchanges with my husband I figure out where I am and what I need to do. My poor son tries so hard to help me by naming every street sign he sees, reminding me of the time and so forth. This in his eyes is helpful, in mine it's added pressure! We meet up with Brian and follow him to the easy to locate hotel down the interstate. What did we do without cell phones!!! As I'm tailing him and searching for the Quality Inn while talking on the cell phone......do you see it? No. It's supposed to be on the right hand sign, Oh man, not another red light! We need to switch lanes, now we need to turn around. This exchange goes on for quite some time. Finally we decide to ditch his car in another hotel parking lot and at this point take off like superman, as fast as a speeding bullet, because it is now 7:45. We need to be at the David Copperfield show by 8:30 and we have 27 miles to go to get to the destination, mind you we've never been there, so more directions! We surprisingly don't have any problems finding it and quickly park our car. By this time it is 8:20......shew, we made it. My son, Zachery, is a stickler for being on time, actually he likes to be early for everything. So this, to him, was late. We jetted into the beautiful and new center to find our seats. Oh, yeah I forgot to mention. Zachery and I never ate dinner. That was supposed to happen before the show, because we had SOOOO much time. Never fear, we'll hit concessions inside. That's great except all they had to offer was candy and chips. We both ate a snickers, because they satisfy you and drank some lemonade. I know, not a wonderfully, nutritious meal or combination, but we were desperate. We sat in our seats, which thanks to Uncle Wes, were wonderful. Finally, we sat back and relaxed. The show was amazing, mind boggling and entertaining. All of the running around, frantic, stressful inconvenience was worth it when I looked over and saw the expression on my 10 year olds face!!!! Every bad experience, and ill feelings disappeared instantly and brought a smile to my face and to my heart. If I had to go through all of those bad times, and unwanted instances again to see his face I'd do it all again, no question. What a happy ending to a very stressful day.

Thursday, February 21, 2008

Man's best friend

Sometimes I feel so lost and alone. Do you ever wonder where you belong? Is this the life I'm supposed to lead? Why is it some days I feel this way? Is this the natural reaction to a stressful day? I just want to shut down and close the worlds eyes and not let anyone or anything in. I suppose we all have days like these. I'm hoping tomorrow will be different. As I ponder these thoughts, my dog, Tucker, comes lovingly to my side and jumps up front paws on the side of my chair and looks at me with those loyal and unconditional eyes. No matter what, he loves and worships me as if I'm the best thing in his world. Why can't we be more like dogs? There is a definite lesson to be learned from man's best friend.......................life is what you make of it, never take anyone for granted, love unconditionally, don't hold grudges and live life to the fullest. Thanks Tucker for my lesson and thank you for putting things in perspective.

The beginning

This is the beginning for me. My first blog into cyberspace. I haven't fixed my page yet, but thought I'd start with a few words. I will work on my page as I go along and learn by my mistakes. I'm sure that I will need assistance and I'm thinking of asking for help from my sister Julie. She's an experienced blogger and her page is fantastic! I'm at work right now so I will keep this brief. My intent on having a blog is to use this as a way to journal my life, to leave some evidence of my life behind for my friends and family. I'm just an average mother of 2 who loves her family dearly. More details later..............I've got work to do.